I want to forgive my MIL for all that she did to me and my baby-I did all the household work.She just cooked?

They had a std menu .Dal only for 3 days a week and no veg at night.This followed even when i was pregnent.I used to feel so hungry.My hus would take me to hotel.I fel ill bec of that. Doc asked me to eat iddlis my mil would not even prepare that.i was so ill(intestinal infection vomiting all that i ate) that i could not even prepare anything fr myself.My hus again baught them frm a hotel.I fell sick thrice.My ml wont even peep into my room to see if i were i alive or dead.I even washed my cloths when i was ill and pregnent.She would not allow me to wear nighty even in the latter stage of preg.Even in the peak of winter i was not allowed to sit on the sofa(shows disrespect).When i faught against i was seen as a mad girl shouting alone to herself.I went back three months aft my baby was born.I did all the work again even when mine was a sesarian.She will call me if the baby cried.Once to my surprice she prepared poridge powder fr baby.Ltr i came to know rice was not even cleaned.